Amman Softball League brings together Jordan's expats and locals in a fun & very competitive adult league. The Slogs chronicle our mischief. The Winter '11 Season, our tenth, runs from January 21 to March 18.
I wouldn't leave y'all hangin'--now that the offending parties have vowed to change their ways. Here's the extended version of SlogsCenter, and it's all about the Nomads and Traitors. Even if you're not a fan of either team, you should check out the clip. Lots of great defense. Congrats to the Traitors on a great win. I have a feeling they may run into the Nomads again soon.
Special thanks to Melissa Manning for the terrific pics and Maher "Zambrano" Abu-Arja for crawling out of bed to shoot some video. Enjoy.
To enhance your viewing experience, let the clip load all the way before watching. You'll enjoy the soundtrack more.
The blaring horns, ubiquitous fireworks and general euphoria that started early Saturday might have seemed like a natural reaction to the Traitors' big win over the Nomads on Friday, but we're not that big just yet. It had a little to do with Iraq's soccer team winning the Asia Cup by defeating Saudi Arabia in the final. (We have confirmed that the US National Soccer Team was standing by to rescue the Saudis from the Iraqis once again, but the refs wouldn't go for it.)
Anyway, Iraqi fans should not celebrate in such a loud manner unless the other team is executed after (or preferably, during) the game. Call me old-fashioned.
Bigger than either the Asia Cup or Traitors-Nomads were theTawjihiCelebrations. For those unfamiliar with local customs here in Jordan, the Tawjihi Celebrations mark the time between when students stop cheating and plagiarizing in high school and the time they start cheating and plagiarizing in college. Typical displays of joy include:
-Applying firm pressure on the car horn until the battery dies. -Being unreasonably optimistic about your financial future. -Setting off fireworks (Note: indoors). -Seeing which person can peck the other's cheek the most times before switching your sexual preference. -Drinking shot after shot of Mafraq's tap water until you soil your pants.
Enough about Tawjihi and Soccer. Let's talk about the other games. You know, the ones which matter.
Alberto Asks the Stars to Say Hello to His Li'l Friend
Tooth + Mallet + Jack Daniel's = Play Ball.
Alberto Santiago returned to Slogway Park after his horrific injury, and he helped his Beats to an easy win over the Stars, who Karma continues to punish for not cleaning up their infant's dugout mess.
Alberto's stint on the disabled list consisted of the time it took him to walk out to his car after the incident last week, where he took a mallet and pounded that tooth back in its place. He then let out a grunt of satisfaction, guzzled some Jack Daniel's, cracked his neck, and returned to the field. Total time: three minutes. The Nomads were just lucky that the episode took place so late in the game. He wanted back in.
Sluggos Get Help, Spank Bling Bling
It took seven weeks, but The Greatest finally hit the Slogs.
Perhaps it was done in a drunken stupor, but Bling Bling had the Sluggos on the ropes before the game even started. Caught short-handed, the Sluggos requested to have another team's player fill in on their team. Bling said OK. Then they saw who the player was: the Beats' Javier "Gunny" Diaz. Bling thought twice. Yvette Martin promised to have Gunny bat only as a lefty. Bling said OK.
This decision was like agreeing to fight Muhammad Ali in his prime, but only if he promised to limit his punches to your face. The Sluggos rolled, and the Blingz cost themselves that precious first win.
Crowd in Awe at Silent Slackers. So Where's Willy?
The Slackers assess Willy's absence.
A handful of Eagles were off hobnobbing with
Hollywood's elite, so the Slackers had a pretty easy win on Friday. This game had major implications for the tournament, because if the two second-place teams stay where they are in the standings, the Slackers would get the #3 seed, while the All-Blacks would have to settle for #4.
The Slackers were so well-behaved, even the Team Mom was flabbergasted. Apparently, they've identified the culprit in their temper tantrums as Walid "Willy" Abu Hassan, who was missing from the game. If that's how they really feel, then co-conspirator (and the guy who was let off the hook), Rocky Abushaar, should send him a big bouquet of flowers and a tall stack of Luigi's pizzas.
Dennis Merdian has an ouchie. That ball is evil...and hungry.
In Jeff Coupe's last game as a Traitor, he helped his team beat the Stars and fathered "Traitor Nation." No word on who the mother is, though, as she apparently wants nothing to do with the whole ordeal. Here's Jeff and his daughter Hannah, setting things straight and saying goodbye...
Dennis Merdian, pitcher for the Stars, took a bullet off his shin, courtesy of Justin "Get Some" Hiester. Dennis is a tough man, and he wouldn't give any Traitor the satisfaction of seeing him hurt. He stayed in the game and played well. (But I have the feeling his wife had to hear a lot of whining later that night.) To his credit, Justin felt awful about the whole thing and offered to pay all of Dennis' tuition fees for grad school.
The bruise on Dennis' shin had barely turned purple before Kevin and Brooke began trading small arms fire with Omar Massarweh of the Nomads, with whom they have a breakfast date next Friday to determine which of the two teams truly rules the regular season. Ziggy and Schwa will be all over that preview. In the meantime, have at each other right here.
Some good news for the Beats: They get the honor of having the SlogsCenter Highlight of the Week. Here's Nomad Shukri Saleh, getting oopsed up between 3rd and home...
The rest of the game was brutal, and I'm not just talking about the score. The Nomads topped the Beats to set up a showdown for league supremacy against the undefeated Traitors next Friday, but the real story was the injury suffered by the Beats' Alberto Santiago.
On a single to right field, Alberto had just passed first base when the laser of a throw came in. Alberto wasn't aware of the throw, which was rather unusual for an outfield single, and it met his mouth. The sound of the impact was sickening, and the scene afterward was a bloody mess.
Freeze, re-use, enjoy? I don't think so: Alberto's recovered tooth.
The good news is that our crack archaeologists found the tooth in the sand and Alberto had it put right back in (Note: Not at the field). A few stitches in his lip, and he'll be back on the field in no time, donning his Yankees cap and giving his opponents hell. And in his honor, the Beats put up an impressive six runs in the final inning.
The right-fielder who threw the ball, known here only as Li'l Massarweh, had his name sent by the US Embassy to Homeland Security. He is now atop the Most Wanted Terrorists list. Good luck getting back to school in the States.
Be careful out there, Sloggers. It's a mad. mad world.
The Beats can finally be called winners. Not that we were calling them losers or anything. It's just been tough to watch, that's all.
But they did lose on Friday. (I'm just sayin'.) In the first game of a double-header, the Slackers got out some frustration from the Jordan Cup game and feasted on some Beats Meat.
In the second game, against a quickly improving Bling Bling team, the Beats did just enough to win. Of course, they were helped by the automatic out Blingball had to take every time their missing female's turn came up in the batting order, but a win is a win.
The tying runner should have been up to bat with two outs in the top of the 6th inning, but that auto-out ended the game right there. When it was pointed out to Blingcap Jawad Dabbas that his team may have won the game had they fielded the required two women, his response was classic:
"That's the story of my life. I always need just one more woman."
The good news for Beats captain Marikay Satryano is that her team finally let her have a meal. Here she is, breaking her fast...
"I'm smart! Not like everybody says, like dumb. I'm smart and I want
respect!"
-Fredo Corelone, The Godfather: Part II
"...or I'll tear his arms off."
-Jeff Coupe, Traitors Shortstop, July 13, 2007
The Traitors rose up to a major challenge and established themselves as the team to beat this season. Schwa the Boycat predicted a tight, low-scoring game with lots of fly balls becoming martyrs in the stiff breeze. He was correct.
Justin Hiester, Jeff Coupe and Ash Samawi each scored twice for the Gatorades, and Brooke Sartawi chipped in another. On the Eagles side, Tom Manning and Andrea Brusseau crossed the plate in the 7-2 Traitors win.
Here are a couple of highlights, including a hello to New Zealand from the Eagles' Matthew Perry...and a worm-burnin' round trip by the Traitors' Justin Hiester.
BREAKING NEWS: You can tell which Traitors are new to winning by looking in the comments section of this post. Some just are not satisfied with having a stacked team and simply being undefeated. They want everyone to worship them, too. Why not? There will be a Traitors Worship Service held at 8:30 AM every Friday, as long as they are on top. After entering the clubhouse, take the hallway on your right, then enter through the second door on your right. (You can "drop off" your donation there at any time.)
While you were soaking your aching muscles in hot water last Friday, a softball game broke out at Slogway Park. The fine people of JICA (Japan International Cooperation Agency) and the Peace Corps got together for an exhibition game.
Even though it was only an exhibition, both teams had some fine ball players on the field. Word is, a few Amman Softball League teams are actively recruiting them.
A Peace Corps guy in a Red Sox shirt and an entire team from the country that brought us Daisuke Matsuzaka and Hideki Okajima. Fantastic.
Nevermind the score. Check out some clips...
Evan Usler of the Peace Corps summons the power of the Red Sox for a Grand Slam.
Reem Amireh-Taweel and Saed Taweel, her husband, went yard (sorta) in back-to-back at-bats in the bottom of the 2nd inning. Their victims were the Slackers.
Yes, this is the second straight week that the Slackers have been on the wrong end of the Highlight of the Week. How do they keep doing it? Teamwork, baby. But hey, the Orange won the game, and that's all we care about.
All the SlogsCenter Highlights shall be gathered HERE
