ASL Season Nine

Episode 1, Friday, June 18:

10:00 AM - Embassy @ Around the Horn
Umps: 1 Slacker & 1 GoodFella

11:30 AM - Slackers @ GoodFellas
Umps: 1 Embassy & 1 Around the Horn

We're Back

"Get it on. Gotta get it on. No choice but to get it on." - Adam Carolla Like a disease in remission, we've come back with rage, killing that false sense of security you felt as you lollygagged away the last ten months of Fridays. The Summer 2009 season of Amman Softball League, our 7th overall, is most definitely on. What does this mean for you? Pain, that's what. You're about to get smacked with balls that have the best size and hardness combo this side of bowling. If you like getting smacked with balls, then you've come to the right place. Welcome. We are also rolling out the same stained red carpet to all those who enjoy smacking balls. See how fairness runs in our blood? We've got Smackers and Slackers and Spitters and Trojans... Botox and JoSox and Nomads and Mo' Nads than any camel-humpin' league in the Middle East. We are here to get some and, dammit, some will be gotten. That felt good. By the way, the Slogs are now Adult Swim. This place is as full of inside jokes as it is full of fun and informative (don't forget well written!) stuff about the league. Read up on ASL, feel free to comment, and get in on the inside jokes. The only rule for Adult Swim: Don't pee in my pool. The deal for this Friday, June 12th: 9:00 AM*: AF11 @ Trojans (Slackers umping) 10:45 AM: Slackers @ JoSox (Trojans umping) 12:30 PM: Noobz @ Nomads (JoSox umping) *That's right, Nine Ay Em. Get over it...or just stay awake from the night before. RULES CHANGES: 1. No more surgical strike. It was dumb. 2. Games are now 7 innings. 3. Infielders positioned behind the basepaths for all batters. 4. Designated Hitter option added. 5. Miss an umping assignment, your team loses a full inning of at-bats. 6. Bring booze into the park, you're ejected & suspended. 7. READ THE RULES! (Note: This is not a rule change.) Maybe I'll have more on the league on Thursday. Maybe I'll decide to do something else instead. Like count the number of hypocrites who pretend to be religious but have no problem waking up entire neighborhoods with their horn-honking, wife-beating and escaped-from-the-zoo children. Softball was a venting mechanism, for all of us. You getting that yet? One word for all the waiters in Jordan: DEODORANT. Two words for getting Jordan out of debt: TRAFFIC PARKING TICKETS. Three words for Le Freak: NEED A LIGHT? Four words for Jeff's uncle: YOUR NEPHEW LIKES BOYS. Five words for all you newcomers: WELCOME TO AMMAN SOFTBALL LEAGUE.

Summer '08 Opening Day

Friday, June 20, 2008 10 AM: Jawaher or the Dragons or Formerly 4U2NV @ The Team in White Featuring Le Freak (UPDATE 7/7/08: This ends up being Bezzig & Lezzig @ JoSox) 11:30 AM: No-mads IV No-Shukri @ Trojans 1:00 PM: Trojans @ Slackers Registration: Please get with your captains and be sure you pay your registration fee this Friday, June 20. ASL will not chase people down: IF YOU DON'T PAY, YOU WON'T PLAY. Bats: After some research, many of the bats we thought were illegal are actually legal. (Saif's home run stands!) If you wish to buy a bat for personal use, please make sure that it is STAMPED with ASA's approval. (What is NOT OK: NSA, USSSSSSSSA, ISA, "Official Softball," etc.) Only ASA bats going forward. This has been in our rules since we started Amman Softball League. It's a safety issue. No whining about it, please. (Blame Eyad Zoubi of the Nomads for being the first person in ASL's six seasons to ever ask the ump to check the legality of a bat. And this was after a home run during a freaking scrimmage game.) Sportsmanship: If you want to complain about a call during a game, hold your tongue. Be cool and don't embarrass yourself or the league. Finally: READ THE RULES. They're the same as last season. (Look in the Downloadables section, on the right. UPDATE: The link has been fixed. Thanks, Karim! A single click will now take you to the download page.) Good luck, play hard and be safe. It's wide open this season. Anyone can take the trophy.

Week One Results: Blood Follows Rain

A couple of massacres during Week One -- and a nice comeback that needed an extra inning before it reached the FDA-recommended internal cooking temperature. DEC. 8, 2007: Nomads 30, 4U2NV 2 Hit Squad 19, Trojans 14 (7 innings) Green Monsters 33, Slackers 11 A few notes: * 4U2NV does not exist just for you to envy. They exist for you, too, Nevada. * Them Nomads look tough. Last year's home run champ was freakin' pitching for them. * The Trojans could not protect a lead. Punsters, have fun in the comments section. * Hit Squad has heart. On such a large team, great things will happen if the pecking order is decided by game skills. * The Slackers just want to say: Yil3an abu umm jamal sittek fi sitteen surmayeh! * The Green Monsters have reloaded. Come get us.

Summer 2007: Opening Day

The fourth season of Amman Softball League got underway on Friday, June 15 at the Amman Little League Association complex in Amman (where else?), Jordan.

As with previous ASL seasons, we’re doing this for charity, with half the proceeds going to ALLA and half to Gift of Life Amman (GOLA). The League has grown quite a bit in popularity over the last few years, as evidenced by the record eight teams participating in the Summer 2007 season.

On & Off the Field Volunteers: Bob Conover and Marikay Satryano were honored by throwing out the ceremonial first pitches. Bob took charge of getting the field ready for ALLA, and Marikay helped save lives through GOLA.

After the ceremonial first pitches were thrown by Marikay Satryano and Bob Conover, the opening game, featuring the two US Embassy teams, the Beats and Sluggos, started off with a bang. A ten-run bang, that is, by last season’s runners-up, the mighty Sluggos. The Beats could not recover as their embassy rivals kept pouring it on, but the losing side showed spirit and grit, pressing on despite having several first-time softball players in their lineup. Sluggos win in their Long Division debut, but this is not the last we'll hear from the Beats.

The second game of Opening Day was between two evenly matched teams from the Division of Labor, the Stars and (gasp) Bling Bling. In a contest that was tight until late in the game, Bling Bling took a 7-6 lead in the fourth inning, but then the Stars put their hitting foot down and scored 13 unanswered runs to end the game. Stars 19, Bling Bling 6.

Two of the more polished teams met in the third game, with the Nomads facing the Eagles in a thrilling, back-and-forth affair which featured clutch hitting and solid defense by both sides. The Eagles’ youngsters, kids from the ALLA baseball Seniors division, held their own and impressed with their skills, making plays with their bats and gloves. But the In the end, the Nomads held on for a 10-7 win against their Labor rivals.

The final game of Opening Day had enough plotlines to make for a really bad soap opera. Last season’s champs, the undefeated Green Monsters, seemed to vanish into thin air like Keyser Soze…but elements remain. The handful of Monsters still in Jordan regrouped with a few veterans of other teams and renamed themselves, appropriately, the Traitors. Ash Samawi, chief among the defectors, left his old team, the Slackers, and led off the game against them with a three-bagger. Having refused to join in their former captain’s defection, the Slackers replied with cold stares and one hell of a game, keeping it tight and tense until a late push gave the Traitors a 16-9 win in a game that was closer than the score would indicate. The two Long Division foes won’t meet again until the final week of the regular season, August 10.

Games are played at the ALLA Complex, every Friday, from June 15 through August 17, beginning at 9:00 AM. Please come out and enjoy Softball in Amman!